I realized the other day that I haven’t really talked about my employer, Consumer Testing Labs, all that much.
So, what is it that we do?
Let me quote from our web site so I get it correct: “Since 1952, we have been helping quality conscious retailers and manufacturers ensure the quality of the products they sell and by doing so protect their business and their most important asset–their customers’ continued patronage.”
Basically, we help out the consumer by ensuring quality products are on the shelves and the retailer by ensuring they don’t sell products that will be returned frequently or are hazardous to the health/safety of their customers. Not only that, but we do it faster, better, and cheaper than the competition!
With all that being said, let me explain why it’s a cool company. I have to openly admit that our testing laboratories are really hypnotic (interesting) places to visit.
We have a world-wide presence in three major categories of testing:
1) Food — essentially anything edible
2) Softlines — essentially anything you wear
3) Hardlines — everything else (yes, a massive category)
On my initial interview with the company, I received a first-class tour of the Food Labs located in Bentonville, Arkansas. I can truly say that the food testing process is awe-inspiring. The employees who test these food products are highly skilled and the testing procedures they go through are rigorous, complicated, and highly accurate. They use machinery and test equipment in the lab that I swear I’ve only seen in Star Trek episodes. But outside of the cool equipment, even the simple taste-testing area is neat.
Truthfully though, the Hardlines lab is my real favorite. Can you imagine how fun it is to test the break strength of steel cable? Or to see how many tons it takes to cause an industrial shelving unit to collapse? How bout checking the electrical bleed tendencies of high power air conditioners? You can imagine the fun when it comes time to test barbecue grills! It’s a really fascinating place that is always buzzing with activity, huge machines, and strange noises. Every time I go there, at least one test-in-progress captivates my attention for a lengthy time (usually only as long as I’m allowed to stand there gawking). I’m just skimming the top here, but I think you get the picture; it’s a cool place.
But even the Softlines Lab has neat stuff going on. Fiber analysis, color accuracy testing, & children’s sleepwear flammability testing just barely touches on all the interesting testing that occurs there.
So yeah, basically, it’s a pretty unique place to work.
As a web developer, I don’t get to see all the testing that occurs every day, but my job is to enable the testers and the company itself to achieve goals more accurately, efficiently, and faster by leveraging existing technology and creating new technology where it fits.
The employees at Consumer Testing Labs have a lot of pride in their work and although I don’t get to blow stuff up on a daily basis, I really enjoy the fact that my efforts enable our employees’ hard work to pay off even more for themselves and the company as a whole.
If you have any interest in working for us, please check out our job openings (and tell em’ I sent ya). We always seem to have new jobs available as the company keeps growing and growing.
In the mean time, just remember that we might’ve tested that chain saw you use every weekend or that piece of cheese you ate last night; so feel free to silently thank us that neither one killed you!